There’s nothing worse than when you’re falling for a guy and you thinking about a future with him but he’s just there for the good time. He keeps spinning you around and you end up wasting time on a relationship that isn’t headed anywhere. If you’ve been going out for a while and you don’t want to come right out and ask how he feels about you, these signs can tell you what you need to know. Is he serious about you? Here’s how to tell.
1. He genuinely wants to get to know you.
If a guy is serious about you, he’s going to try to learn as much as he can about you. He’ll want to know how you like to spend your free time, what you’re passionate about, and even what your hopes and dreams for the future are.
2. He treats you like a priority, not an afterthought.
This is not to say that everything he does in life will revolve around yo, but he’ll put you and your needs into consideration when making decisions. He’ll make time for you. He’ll make you feel cared for. When he has other things going on in his life, he’ll inform you ahead of time that he’ll be busy.
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4. He’s totally honest and open with you.
Why bother being vulnerable or sharing your innermost thoughts and feelings with a casual hookup? It’s not a productive exercise. So if a guy is being open and honest with you that means he sees you as someone he can trust. He’s not going to lie to you or play games. When things go wrong, he’ll talk to you about it rather than bottling it all up.
5. When he makes promises, he keeps them.
If he’s serious about you, he’s going to put in a lot of effort to not disappoint you. He’s not going to flake on you. If he says he’s going to call you later, he will. He’s not going to make you have doubts about how important you are to him. He’ll come through for you even when you don’t expect him to.
6. He puts in an effort to hang out with you.
A guy who’s serious about you is going to love spending time with you. And I’m not just talking about getting together to hook up. He’s going to want to see you outside of the bedroom because he can’t get enough of you. He’ll plan fun dates and cancel some of his regular plans just so he can chill with you.
7. He stays in touch no matter what.
There’s nothing more annoying than when someone disappears from your life without warning and then pops back in like everything’s okay. A guy who’s serious about you will not go ghosting on you. He’ll check in with you regularly. If he’s going to be busy, he’ll let you know so you’re not left wondering why he isn’t replying your texts.
8. He plans things with you.
Whether it’s dates, a getaway, games night, a concert, or inviting you to a friend’s wedding weeks from now, he’s going to make plans with you if he’s serious about you. He won’t call you up at midnight to see if you want to hook up or include you in last minute plans as an afterthought. If he’s trying to make plans with you, whether big or small, that’s a good indicator of seriousness.
9. He asks for your opinions and listens to them.
Does he involve you when he has decisions to make? Does he confide in you about the little and big problems in his life? Does he seek your advice? Does he take your opinions seriously instead of just dismissing them or treating them as “silly”? If the answer is yes, then he’s probably serious about you.
10. He discusses the future with you.
If he plans to keep you around long term, he’s going to talk about the future with you. He’ll discuss all the things you could do together, and not just in an abstract way. He’ll have real concrete goals and plans for the future. This is because he wants both of you to build together and grow in the same direction.
11. He wants you to get to know the people close to him.
A guy who’s not serious about you is going to do his best to keep you away from his friends and family. He won’t even mention you to them. So if he’s introducing you to the people he cares about, that might be his way of saying this is more than a fling. He’s showing a commitment to you and letting you deeper into his life.
12. He tries to share his interests with you.
The things we like to spend time doing and stuff we’re passionate about are a huge part of our personality. When we like someone and we see them being around for a long time, it’s only normal to want to share the things we enjoy with them. By sharing his interests, he’s opening up himself to you.
13. He does things to make you happy.
Maybe it’s cooking your favorite meals or taking care of you when you’re sick. Or buying you a gift because he saw it and thought about you. If he likes you for real, he’ll do all kinds of thoughtful things that’ll make your heart warm. He’ll make it his mission to put a smile on your face.
14. He doesn’t want to see other people.
A guy who wants to build something real with you isn’t going to be running around hooking up with other people. Assuming, of course, that he’s not the polyamorous kind and you’re not interested in an open relationship. He’s going to willingly give up other women to focus on you.